Autumn 4th Quarter Journal 2018 October-December

 

OCTOBER

1 October 2018 Monday

Hard to believe it's October already but I am ready for cooler weather, colorful leaves, apple cobblers, and pumpkin bread. I finished my report for Wednesday and made copies of the 1988 AIDS chronology down at Kinkos. I will bake Walnut Maple cookies for the history group later. So far not a whole lot of response on the FB event Page. I bought tickets for Viva La Diva' s Trick or Treat show for the 13^th  for Michael, Alan, Kyle, TJ, Jim and I. That was $195 with tax but I can’t wait. The tickets were $30 each so with the tickets for the Grand Theater I should be reimbursed $ 50 each from the guys. We are also going to Rocky Horror at the Grand Theater on the 27^th. Rich Butler said they had some rain and over at Mike’s place on 4^th North and 5^th West they had rain but dry as a bone here. I went to the library and checked out two more Hercule Poirot books, Evil Under the Sun and Three Little Pigs. I made a Shepherd Pie for supper and brought some over to Mike’s. It was simple but good.

 

2 October 2018 Tuesday

Do not know what got into TJ and the pups last night but they woke me up at 12:30 acting like they were really hungry. I fed them hamburger and mac & Cheese but I think only Buddy really ate all of his. So I got up and fed them some hot dog snacks and read more from Evil Under the Sun before trying to go back to bed at 1:30. Then TJ went outside several times scratching at the bedroom outside door to be let in. Only Buster didn’t keep me up last night. Started to clean out my garden when a shower stopped me...last of my squash and grape tomatoes before I pull them all out...my pups were so bad last night especially TJ...waking me at 1230 to feed him hot dogs because he didn't like the hamburger and Mac & Cheese I made them for supper...so then of course the rest of them are up wanting treats too... I was wide awake by then so I read Evil Under the Sun until 130 then tried to go to sleep but noooo...TJ kept going out the doggie door running down the veranda to my bedroom door and scratched and scratched until I got out of bed to let him in... I have very bad dogs. I have Evil Under My Roof...Italian casserole... comfort food for a rainy day To glaze or not to glaze that is the question Getting a good soaking rain finally .... yay...A huge thunder clap scared the bejeezuz out of Harleigh and he's up in bed with me... it's coming down pretty hard here I think I've lost a little weight since I was given this award

 

 

 

 

Marty Pollock She moved to Oklahoma after years of entertaining Salt Lake's Court and was murdered. Shocking when we heard the news. She was awesome.

 

3 October 2018 Wednesday

It was a wild and wicked night in SLC Downed power line, fire, cuts electricity to TRAX in downtown Salt Lake City; riders told make alternate plans for Wednesday morning commute

gave away six pumpkins and found these two in my pumpkin patch so I put on my porch... I couldn't find my phone today so I was not contacted by the great orange blob today... I guess I will dig around in the car tomorrow... we had some rain this afternoon but nothing like yesterday ... air smells so fresh and clean

 

4 October 2018 Thursday

Time to start putting my garden to bed...Putting the garden away ... it was certainly the year for squash and pumpkins... I still have lots and lots of green tomatoes that never ripened over the summer...Will leave them and before first frost pick them and let them window ripen

Spent about an hour this cool morning pulling up my squash plants....next year more pumpkins and less squash lol

It's raining men hallelujah well actually more like cats and dogs...when I had to take Coco home we had a belly washer here and had to take the pups down the front stairs to the garage and it was only sprinkling over by Michael's ... it's been a good soaking rain turning the back yard to mud...why couldn't it had rained when I was growing a garden?

 

5 October 2018 Friday

Bill Poore took me to lunch and we tried a new Chinese place in Bountiful near where I use to work called Boba World... I had eggplant in garlic sauce and while good I ate too much ... Jim Dabakis asked me to go with him to SLAC tonight to see a comedy I never heard of and a title that is about 10 words long... beautiful fall day after all the rain we had.

Home from seeing A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Gynecologic Oncology Unit at Sloan Kettering Cancer Center of New York City at the Salt Lake Acting Company with Jim Dabakis ... very intense play and first rate acting ...it was directed by U of U acting professor Sarah Shippobotham

 Jeff Flake and his fellow Mormons Mike Lee, Orrin Hatch, Dean Heller, and Mike Crapo show once again that they have no decency and are only loyal to the Republican Overlords and not the country.

6  October 2018 Saturday

Buddy got groomed today... such a handsome boy for someone who was supposed to have been dead in August...takes a licking but keeps on ticking I’m reading Agatha Christies Five Little Pigs surrounded by 5 sleepy little pups... Buster wants to be near Buddy and the old boys have bonded... Harleigh is my lone wolf who'd rather be off on his own

This will be the beginning or the end depending on who votes this November It took 150 years for the Confederate States to finally defeat the United States... we have a conservative Supreme Court dedicated to preserving white male supremacy and the wealth of the 1 percent. We have a government dedicated to feudalism and an oligarchy...

 

7 October 2018 Sunday

Snow in the mountains and chilly down here in the valley. I was up early to start putting dinner together. I put the roast in the crockpot and put together the apple pie to bake. I had TJ, Jim, Michael, and Bill over for Sunday dinner at 1 pm. It was Jim's birthday a week ago. I served pot roast, mashed potatoes & Gravy, candied carrots, squash soufflé, green beans with bacon and mushrooms, and homemade rolls. I also had an. Apple pie for dessert. I think people had a good time because except for Bill Poore the rest stayed until almost 5 visiting. I sent everyone home with left overs. Then I got ready to head down to Draper for visiting hours from 6:30 until 8. I wanted to let Kyle know to expect two letters with information on line course for Indiana State and Colorado State Universities. Craig Crawford’s parents were out from Virginia visiting him. Kyle and I had a good visit and he said it’s getting harder and harder to care about anything in prison knowing that he will be going to a half-way house come this December. It was a cold wind down at the point of the mountain and even with a long sleeve shirt on it was really cold standing outside waiting for the prison gates to let us out. During Mormon Conference the Mormon CEO Russell is calling all women "mothers" now... I have been calling all Mormons mothers for years... you know if I called your wife, sister, or daughter mother you'd have a restraining order put on me.. He also said that Satan encourages the use of the name Mormon instead of Jesus Christ when referring to the church. That is his pet project. Hard to take Mormon Conferences seriously when the majority of Mormons are Trump regime supporters and Mormon senators voted to confirm a man to the Supreme Court who could not even pass a temple recommend interview... Dallin Oaks yesterday condemned marriage equality and transgenders and encouraged Mormons to oppose civil rights for Gays and Trans. Deep down I know Dallin Oaks is a good person... six feet deep down. So the Mormon CEO Russell is calling all women "mothers" now... I have been calling all Mormons mothers for years... you know if I called your wife, sister, or daughter mother you'd have a restraining order put on me... Hard to take Mormon Conferences seriously when the majority of Mormons are Trump regime supporters and Mormon senators voted to confirm a man to the Supreme Court who could not even pass a temple recommend interview... Am I the only one starting to feel like a stranger in my own country?

 

8 October 2018 Monday

My Puritan work ethic says I should be mowing my lawn, rotor tilling my garden, cleaning my kitchen, and finishing laundry but my Southern hedonistic nature says to stay in bed with my sleeping dogs and watch Hulu all morning drinking my mocha marshmallow coffee... damn my genes. So that is what I did until noon until my Danforth Puritan side of my family won out over my Johnson hillbillies so I went shopping for pup food, did all the dishes, cleaned out the food pantry, and utensil drawer, put out a new table cloth and defrosted the downstairs freezer. I made a meat loaf for dinner with a baked potato and yellow squash from the garden. It was cool and over cast for much of the day not getting much higher than 55 degrees. It was a national holiday so no mail today. Its either Columbus Day or Indigenous  People’s Day. You pick.

 

9 October 2018 Tuesday

The pups woke me up at 4:30 and it was 5:30 before I could fall back asleep. I left some potatoes and broccoli in the crock pot over night and got up to see that they were way over cooked so spent the morning peeling potatoes and starting over ha! Picked all the green tomatoes and now my garden is done. Not sure if the tomatoes will ripen  but at least they won’t freeze. I also decided to make a meat loaf for supper. Utahns are going to vote to legalize medicinal marijuana and the Church-State theocrats are going bat shit crazy trying to figure out How they can control it and profit from it. Whenever I see an R behind a candidate or incumbents name, I think does it stand for Racist or Rapist or Repulsive?

 

10 October 2018 Wednesday

A good soaking rain all night long after a bone-dry summer... couldn't have it during our growing season... snow is piling up in the mountains they say... It's so dark already at 7 am... good news the dogs are sleeping in more and the summer flies are gone. Nothing to do this rainy gloomy morning but make chocolate chip oatmeal walnuts & pecan cookies... I threw in some crushed bran flakes so that makes them healthy. I had to change my sheets this morning because one of the rascals pinched a taffy and buried it in my bed... body heat and taffy don't do well together... At noon I went off to the Gay Men’s Sack Lunch and there were only a few of us about 5 probably because of the damp weather. Since official weather records have been kept from 1895 , Utah has never experienced a year with as little precipitation as it did in 2018 and only one previous year registered higher average. 2018 was the driest year ever but it's raining today so Climate Change must be false... this logic is the same one that got Trump elected. I got my ballot today... easy voting straight Democrat and for all the propositions and SLC street bond but don’t have strong opinions on the judges or amendments A & B & C. I will vote yes on all the propositions.

 

11 October 2018 Thursday

Before Stonewall "coming out" simply meant admitting to one’s self that you were Gay but after Stonewall "coming out" meant telling others you were Gay and thus beginning to build a collective identity and tying one's fate with those of others. This built community, safety in numbers, and political protection. Stonewall was the paradigm shift from shame to pride. I went to the Utah Pride Center at noon for Coming Out Day...I helped Liz Pitts cut up lettuce and tomatoes for the hamburgers... it was a good turn out and I met Shareen Ghorbani who is running for Utah's 2nd District as a Democrat at the Pride Center...I am a yellow dog Democrat and vote straight party but nice to have met the person running against Trumpist Stewart. Robert Austin said I should vote yes on the gasoline tax for education so I will. Well I did my Gay Patriotic duty and went back down to the Utah Pride Center for Coming Out Day BBQ with Mike Romero for hamburgers and hotdogs and vegan gluten free mini cupcakes with frosting the color of the rainbow flag... this 18-year-old girl joined Mike and I and told us what letter in the alphabet she was...something asexual polyromantic ... she was sweet... so glad we just had one word Gay to cover a multitude of sins. Brandon Devlin was cooking hamburgers and hotdogs. He told me that the board has accepted the Historical Society as a project of the center. Good News.

 

12 October 2018 Friday

Busy day working on a project for the Utah Pride Center collecting photos of Kristen Ries Award Recipients and contacting as many of them as I can. Hurricane Michael was the strongest hurricane to hit Florida so Sending thoughts and prayers to all the Trump supporters devasted by Hurricane Michael ... Keep electing climate change deniers.

·         Robert Moolman You are UNBELIEVABLE! Thank you! Baie Dankie! Thank you!

·         Kim Russo - How about you call me at 801 661 7408 on Tuesday any time before 1130 am and I can meet you down front. We are on 450 west between 300 and 200 south. You will see UHP trooper cars there so just pull to the curb and I will come down.

 

13 October 2018 Saturday

I went down to Draper to see Kyle this morning at 9:30. The outside guard who checked our driver’s license was young and handsome. Never saw him before. Prison porn fantasy handsome. Kyle said he just got my letters about on-line colleges just yesterday. I wonder why it took so long. After leaving the prison I went straight home because Michael was coming over to winterize his camper trailer and to put new hatchback struts on the cruiser because they were getting weak and starting to slide but he didn’t have the right star shape screw driver tip so he has to do it later. I gave him the rest of my meat loaf and a container of corn chowder because I was having to hard of a time chewing the corn kernels with what little teeth I have left. Alan Anderson came over about 4:30 because he was up in Bountiful getting new tires put on his Lincoln and didn’t want to drive all the way back down to Midvale. Michael, TJ, and Jim came over at 5:30 and we went out to Chubby’s for dinner before heading down to Club X. Jim and TJ had been fussing and later I found out why. Jim has been diagnosed with Parkinson Disease and TJ wants to move into a one-story place to avoid all the stairs at their townhouse in Daybreak. Jim doesn’t want to at all and they have been fussing over the change in Jim’s health and TJ is understandably afraid for Jim and their relationship. We went to Club X at 6:30 to see the Viva La Diva Trick or Treat Show where we met up with Charles Bigo and Richard Harmston. Kyle Daniels took an Uber up from Midvale so there was 8 of us all together. I really had fun but was slightly disappointed that the theme wasn’t a little more Halloweenish. Their opening number was the 3 witches from Hocus Pocus singing I put a Spell On You. But it was still fun. I think TJ really liked it and wants to go to the Christmas show. Alan Anderson was part of the Best Little Whore House Number and he got two free tickets for his participation. When Jason Cosmo asked if Alan was married to a woman or a man, Alan said a Man and Jason said for his money or big dick and Alan said, “Big Dick” and Kyle then stood up while people cheered. It was fun. I didn’t get to bed until nearly midnight when all was said and done.

 

14 October 2018 Sunday

I stayed in bed almost all-day binge-watching Alison Janney in the TV series Mom. I did make some clam chowder after giving my corn chowder away to Michael because I had a hard time chewing the corn. The pups all snuggled in with me. I almost forgot that Alan Anderson invited me to the Salt Lake Acting Company at 6 pm and so at 5:40 I just threw on some clothes and rushed over there. The play The Wolves was from 6 pm until 7:30 and was a complete bore for me but because there was no intermission I had to stay. It was about a teenage girl soccer team called The Wolves... I didn't understand a bit of it  and there was no real plot but there was a lot of kicking balls around. If I was a Lesbian I probably would have liked it. Hard freeze tonight down into the 20's... Eric Peterson of the Tribune authored an excellent article on the murder of Tony Adams.

 

15 October 2018 Monday

It's 30 degrees this morning... anything left in gardens is gone and there is frost of the pumpkins... any warm weather after today will be an Indian Summer. I made some bran raisin & pecan muffins for breakfast this morning. Yummy. Hot coffee and raisin & pecan bran muffins fresh from the oven this October morning...old people got to get their bran in somehow... these are moist and not dry like store bought ones Radio West wants Eric Peterson and myself to be interviewed by Doug Fabrizio on KUER about the Tony Adams murder in 1978 tomorrow at noon. Probably will air the following day. Pictures from the 1987 Unity Show was posted on the Royal Courts FB page and there was a picture of me. Never knew this picture existed... I had come back from the March on Washington and read a poem from an AIDS Quilt activist I met on the train coming home... I was on the stage at Chuck Whyte' annual Unity Show at Backstreet.

23 October 1987

·         Bill Poore Elizabeth Warren is part Indian....she had her DNA done, to shut up that stupid Drump

 

16 October 2018 Tuesday

Home from taping a show for Doug Fabrizio's Radio West. The show was about Eric Peterson Tribune piece on his investigation of Tony Adams murder in 1978. I was there to provide information for the times... I was a gap filler inner...lol. Michael Aaron should be happy that I corrected their intro of me as a writer for the Q magazine ... I said it's the QSalt Lake magazine. it will air tomorrow at 9 am on KUER. When I took Coco home Michael installed new struts on the hatchback of the PT Cruiser so I don't have to worry about it falling down on my head all the time.

 

17 October 2018 Wednesday

Today Is Kyle Foote’s 39^th birthday. I went to the Gay Men’s Sack Lunch today and TJ, Jim, Charles, and Richard were all there as well as about four others. We talked about the New Yorker restaurant closing. It was a 40-year institution for sure although I only ate there a few times. Finished reading all my Agatha Christies Hercule Poirot books and need to get some more. This is a Biscuit recipe I want to try- 1 1/2 cups Unbleached Self-Rising Flour, 3/4 cup heavy or whipping cream, 1/8 to 1/4 teaspoon salt, optional: for a saltier biscuit. If the dough doesn't come together readily, dribble in an additional 1 to 2 tablespoons cream, to make it totally cohesive. Bake in Preheated the oven at  450°F,

 

18 October 2018 Thursday

Woke up at 530 Hearing all this commotion in the kitchen with doggy bowls being over turned so I get up to see what the racket was and I see Buddy limping and not walking well... flopping over food bowls with kibbles spilled all over the floor ...I was so upset worried that he was having a seizure and helped him go outside like he was trying to do but he must have just had a foot go to sleep or a spasm because he's fine now sleeping at my side while I am now wide awake... my life as the alpha dog Spent 3 hours in the garden clearing out the plants, and rotor tilling the dirt to turn in organic material back into the soil... It  was a warm day about 60 degrees. Farmer Ben is done for the season. I heard the Boys In the Band is up for a Tony as Best Revival Play although it never played on Broadway until last year

 

19 October 2018 Friday

Kim Russo messengered me that she wasn’t feeling well so I won’t have to meet her today. I put chocolate frosting on the chocolate cake I made yesterday along with chopped walnuts and pecans. I need an intervention. Evidently I am making cakes for no apparent reason... is there a 12 Step support group for compulsive bakers? Went to lunch at Charlie Chows with Bill Poore this afternoon... it was a pretty day to be out and about...I delivered to him some clam chowder, chicken noodle soup, and Beef and vegetable soup as well as a fourth of the chocolate cake I made... he buys me lunch and I load him up with home cooking...symbiotic. Facebook is censoring comments now... I guess calling Trump white trash is now inappropriate and my comments were blocked... but Trump praising a Congressman who assaulted a journalist and doing nothing about the Khashoggi murder is acceptable.

·         Bill Poore Just put everything in the Frig and looked at the cake, wow, tasted it, amazing....how about lunch again next week on me?

 

20 October 2018 Saturday

I went down to see Kyle this afternoon. It was pretty crowded but no Craig Crawford. He said that he probably will go to the half-way house to cook in December either the 3^rd or the 10^th but it will be a Tuesday because that is when they transfer prisoners. He wants me to fill out an application for online classes as soon as I can. I told him I would this week for sure. On the way home there was a multiple car wreck on I 15 North Bound just before 72nd South... I got caught in the traffic jam that shut down the fwy. It took me 45 minutes to go from 90th South to 72nd... ugh...so many other vehicles were evidently having problems too from idling for such a long time. Trump just lies all the time and his ignorant supporters just do not care. Genocide and other dark deeds can only happen when journalists are killed and a free press suppressed...

 

21 October 2018 Sunday

May be the last warm day to get out to do some yard work so spent most of the morning outside. I moved the garden railings back 4 feet to expand my garden for next year and while moving the paving stones to rest the cinder blocks on I saw a huge black widow beneath it...I said Mrs. widow don't bother me and I won't bother you... I also had to dig up all these sapling roots before I can rotor till the soil. That was a lot of work and I was sweating...but it's a beautiful autumn day to be grubbing and I am grateful I have a piece of earth to call my own to keep my livestock (pups) in. So I spent most of the day putting the South side yard to bed for the winter, tilling, mowing, pruning. Half my side yard is now a garden patch... I don't know whether it's the farmer or faerie in me that wants to grow things... but now I am bushed.. pun intended. I made a loaf of pumpkin bread but don’t worry it's for a pumpkin carving party at Jesse Dolce’s and not just an obsession... no I didn't eat the entire chocolate cake. I gave half to Michael Romero and a quarter to Bill Poore so I have just been nibbling on it... pretty tasty I must add. The tomatoes I picked green and put in a brown paper sack are turning... these are heirloom tomatoes and are supposed to look scallywampus and they do.

 

22 October 2018 Monday

Today is my only niece’s 47^th birthday. I was ambitious today. I stripped my bed, remade it, did up laundry, went shopping, made some pumpkin cranberry bread, and went out to Cottonwood Heights’ ACE Hardware store to see if Billy Bikowski was working . Beau Chaine had said that Billy Bikowski was working at ACE hardware and I went over there not knowing what I’d say or do but he wasn’t there and didn’t work until Wednesday. So I made up the downstairs guest room putting on clean sheets and a new comforter I had bought at DI. I also hung Kyle's old clothes that  I saved for him up in the closet. The dogs all ate and are now snoozing. The darken weather puts them right out. We Got a little bit of rain this late afternoon but it cleared up in time to go to a Pumpkin Carving Party this evening. I brought a pumpkin I grew from my garden and some pumpkin bread. Fun evening carving pumpkins at Jesse’s place at 1122 East 800 South which is on the hill. They had it all decorated up very halloweenish... I didn't actually carve a pumpkin but Michael did the one I brought from my Garden. Michael carved a bat in his. Jesse carved hands like holding open a butt hole. Nasty LOL. Dave Omer and Darby were about the only ones there I knew but there was about 12 of us altogether. I don't like my hands in all the pumpkin guts lol

 

23 October 2018 Tuesday

Rich Butler wanted to come over to visit at 10:30 and he stayed until 1 so my day was basically shot. I spent some of the day setting up an email account for Kyle so I can register him online at the Indiana State University for classes in Construction Management. Kylefoote1079  @yahoo.com and password WKF@187422. Kind of a really lazy day after being out last night. I made some bean soup for dinner.

 

24 October 2018 Wednesday

I brought Bill Poore to the Pride Center for the Gay Men’s Sack Lunch and I think he enjoyed himself. We stopped at Arctic Circle and I bought a hamburger and a pumpkin shake. It was too much. Charles, Richard, TJ, and Jim were there. After taking him home I drove over to Ace’s to make contact with Billy. I need to put my thoughts and feelings down while they are still fresh in my mind. I just came home from seeing Billy Bikowski after nearly 25 years and the feeling is still like a dull blow on the heart. I know it’s a compulsion that I had to see him once I learned from Beauchaine that he was working at the ACE hardware store over on Foothill and 39^th Street. When I went into the store it took a moments for him to realize who I was and then his face lit up with recognition and when I went to shake his hand he hugged me instead. I felt so awkward not knowing his reaction or what mine should be after at least 25 years since I last saw him. He asked if I had come to buy something or to see him and I said both but the truth was I just wanted to see him once more. Rugged and handsome as ever time has been kind to Billy. As he was at work we didn’t really get to talk as much as I wanted to and as it would happen someone who he hadn’t seen for a while from his “Ward” showed up at the same time so I had to share Billy. That was always the way it was with Billy. Evidently he knew I had done some genealogy on his family but I wasn’t sure how to respond to that and I said I just do that for my friends because I’m curious. I don’t know whether that was satisfactory or not as he had to go help some customers while I pretended I was shopping. When He was through with helping them he came down to the aisle I was in and we began to visit when his “ward” friend showed up. I learned that he lives near Liberty Park, still rides his bike to work, and he’s the membership clerk in his ward so I guess he’s still an active Mormon. He said there were 750 members in his ward but only about 150 come to church regularly. That Is not what I wanted to visit about but took what I could. He asked about Fran but no one else. I had to be conscious of looking at him as not to stare but I was looking at a beloved ghost. I purchased some Halloween lights and trash bags and then said goodbye. He was glad to see me but didn’t say keep in touch. It made me realize that he has a totally different life and he appeared to be happy with people who think highly of him. Charming Billy. When I went to the car I sat a bit like I was going to get weepy but I didn’t. I think I am still processing it. Perhaps I can put Billy to rest after all these years or may be it just rekindled the torch I have been carrying for him all these years. I feel like I spent the day at the Pride Center. At noon went with Bill Poore to the men's sack lunch and then back at 6 pm for the Utah Queer Historical Society. There were only 6 of us and Brandon and I were the only ones who have consistently come to each meeting. There was Jonie Weiss, Becky Moss, Rich Kane, Randy Hoffman, and Connell O’Donovan who I don’t think was feeling well. We kind of talked about how to organize and I said that I would volunteer to facilitate future meetings if no one else will. Robert Moolman popped in and said that we are the most funded project of the center with a budget of $7000. Wow! I had to leave right at 7 pm for the men's group planning meeting that has a working title of "Men On" then what ever topic that would be discussed... busier now than when I was working. A bunch of pipe bombs were sent to CNN and prominent Democrats like the Obamas and Clintons. So Republican hate speech has caught up providing fodder to the loonies.., watch the GOP protests they had nothing to do with it

·         Robert Moolman If you want an office or a comfy chair, let me know. I know someone who can arrange it. Have heard they love having you there!

·         Benedgar Williams I love the people there that give it such a good vibe especially the executor director... and Kendra, Liz, and Brandon what a great team

·         Beau Chaine Excellent i told you about his whereabouts because i knew it would bring healthy closure for you. I did the same thing cause i was his first contact and over medicated when i met him. God Bless. Even though most of us have found our own churches in our hearts there are those like Billy who will always need that guidance to replace their own personal lack of it.

25 October 2018 Thursday

Spent the morning on this gloomy day applying to Indiana State University for an online course in Construction Management  Email information Kylefoote1079@yahoo.com password Warren@1979… Indiana password Kyle@187422  It cost $25 to register and the reference number is 20101025000012 and tracking number is 279186.

 

26 October 2018 Friday

Need to buy a harness for Buddy today...I have one Schnauzer Buddy  who won't go down the steps without assistance and another Harleigh who won't come up... my house is quickly turning into a care facility for senior dogs ... maybe someday I will need a harness myself!! I went to PetSmart to get Buddy's new harness... It’s  not exactly what I wanted but it was all Pet Smart had and it will work helping him get down stairs. His hind legs don’t support him as much. In the evening Jim Dabakis came over to take me to see Good Standing at Plan B Theater. It was a one man show with actor Austin Archer who was phenomenal however I am so far removed from Mormonism that a play about a Gay boy being excommunicated didn't move me but I know it would have been powerful for anyone not as jaded as I am...going to see Rocky Horror tomorrow and since Alan Anderson said Kyle wasn’t going I asked Jim if he wanted to go and he said sure so I gave him my ticket so he could just met us there... Rocky Horror now that's my genre of theater. Jim said he heard that Filmstruck the program that shows so many great old movies is being removed in late November that is distressing. They arrested a South Florida Trump supporter as the man who sent bombs to Democrats and their supporters.

·         Ruadhan O'Sheridan I don't think it's because you are jaded. I think it because many of those wounds of Mormonism have finally healed for you. You have worked the poison out in decades of activism and resistance. And in your sage-ing (same as croning, but for a male elder) the scabs have flaked away and there is no open wound for them to continue to harm you. Your reaction to this is a deeper form of "been there and got the T-shirt." Now the gods have other things for you to attend to. Just my opinion and observation. :) You know, I think, for ex-Mormons, that the lack of emotional upheaval from such a play is like a kind of initiation. I have found that in the Witchen world, the real initiation occurs before the actual ritual that recognizes its occurrence. I salute you for enduring this part of the crooked path and a Blessed Samhain to celebrate your victory and liberation.

·         Benedgar Williams Ruadhan O'Sheridan I think you are right...I walked away from Mormonism 32 years ago and I suppose, since I was not a cultural Mormon , I was not as scarred by it as others were but it took lots of Gay activism to slough off the good, the bad, and the ugly of institutionalize religion where protecting the organization is more essential than people... the play did ask questions like when will Mormonism act like the true church it claims to be ... not that I care anymore...I'm like Glinda the Good Witch "Begone you have no power here." Thank you for your insight ... I value it from someone who has been part of my journey

·         Bill Poore No he is indeed jaded I know that I am still very much jaded. I will never forget the number of young gay Mormon boys that killed themselves because of Dallin Oaks....hard to believe that evil man is the next president of that church. Every time I see him I want to puke, screw him and the smile in rides in on...

·         Beau Chaine' Yeah I repented from it when I was 14 and sent the tithing letter back at 27. Now I have another day off a week and a 10 percent raise! LOL

 

27 October 2018 Saturday

11 months ago when I adopted Buster and he was so frightened and scared that he would nip and bite at me if I went near him. He'd run away and hide if anyone would come over. Now he's sleeping next to me on his back in my arms because he's safe and loved. It takes a long time to recover from abuse but he finally has a home where Buster can just be Buster. I spent time yesterday doing prep work for lunch after the show and this morning mopping and cleaning … Getting ready to do the time warp again with a bunch of old guys who are seeing the matinee showing of Rocky Horror Show at the Grand Theater. There was a time I thought nothing of staying up to midnight to go to the movies to see Rocky Horror and get out at 2 am... these days a 2 pm showing is my speed but still excited. What a great show it was too...it was the best stage performance I have ever seen... all the characters were spot on and Daniel Beecher as Frank N Furter was outstanding... eight of us went, Jim Dabakis, Alan Anderson, Mike Romero, Richard Harmston, Charles Bigo, Jim McMullin, T.J. Otaka, and myself....we also saw Todd Bennett, Ron Hunt, and Becky Moss also there...it was really a fun show, staged well, and Brad and the Creature were super cute. A fun Halloween activity. I have been calling Jim “Gummy Bear Dabakis” because when he was down in Las Vegas he ate a marijuana gummy bear and filmed it saying that at least one state senator should try it before legislating on medical marijuana. His video has been on Jimmy Kimmel and Cobert. He asked me if I wanted to go to the Equality Utah’s Allies Dinner and I said no. I told him to take a young person who would be excited to be there as that these benefit dinners do not impress me at all anymore although I understand the value of them. When I had planned for folks to come to the house after the play, I thought  it being late October it would be soup weather but it was 71 degrees today...I made 3 crock pots of soup however, Mexican stew, Roasted Butternut, and Chicken and Rice. I also made some corn bread and an apple crisp...Jim McMullin and TJ brought some delicious bread for the soup and Richard & Charles me some flowers. Good food and good company and the pups were fairly behaved except Lulubelle who went crazy for TJ's homemade pup treats. Everyone stayed until about 6:00 so it was a full day.

 

28 October 2018 Sunday

I was exhausted this morning but I wanted to go down to Draper to see Kyle Foote at 1 this afternoon. It was a full house with lots of people I hadn’t seen before. Kyle was excited that this Tuesday he will sign the papers so that he can be transferred to Fortitude this December. He thinks it will be in about 4 weeks. We had a good visit then I went over to see Michael Romero and asked if he’d go with me to Best Buy to purchase a new Computer Tower because I worry about the one he gave me eventually going out on me. I was too tired to do anything with it when I got it home so there it sits down stairs until I can get to it. I started watching a lot of films on Film Struck knowing that it is going away.

 

29 October 2018 Monday

It was nice enough today that I pruned back all my Russian Sage to the ground for winter...took me 3 hours and filled up two garbage bins and got a huge bluster on my finger from the cutting shears. I finished watching Come and See the 1985 Russian film of the Nazi attack on Belarus in World War II.  I saw it at Cinema In Your Face years ago downtown Salt Lake City. Why Nazism has not been outlawed in America is very telling as the displaying the Nazi flag outlawed in Germany... the mindset that embraces fascism is a terrorist one... did we fight WWII in vain to let these monsters rear their heads again? Are the memories of the horrors of 75 years ago disappearing with the Greatest Generation. Just when I think the world is going to hell in a hand basket, driving home yesterday I see two young men holding hands walking down the street in my neck of Salt Lake City and I had renewed hope that love conquers all and times have changed for the better ... this would not have been possible 30 years ago. Many Utah Mormons are fascists while most I think are good people. The fascist Mormons are appalled about the Central American refugees making their way to the United States...So little understanding of their own history...Mormons invaded Upper California in 1847... the US coerced Mormons to form a battalion to fight in the Mexican American war and Brigham Young took their wages for the churches migration...then he tried to set up an Independent Mormon nation in land annexed to the United States as a slave territory...all the time Mormons were secretly and deceptively practicing illegal polygamy... you could even say Mormons were the criminals of their day.

 

30 October 2018 Tuesday

I just lounged around all day except going out grocery shopping. My stomach has been upset all day like something is resting hard in my guts. I have had several bowl movements today which is unusual with my surgery because sometimes I can go for days without one. I kind of feel constipated. Definite change in the weather... yesterday it was 50 degrees in the morning but today 35...leaves are really starting to come down so gambling whether to clean them up now knowing more are going to fall or wait a bit into November and hope rain or snow doesn't make a wet mess of them. I've been binge watching an Australian series called Please Like Me. It really resonates with me because the main character played by Josh Thomas is so likeable. Lots of Gay energy. An Article on Hipster cities said Portland of course is number 1 but runner-up is Salt Lake City “probably doesn’t immediately spring to mind as a hipster hot spot. Long associated with the Mormon Church, it’s now also considered, in the words of the Boston Globe, America’s “super gay, super cool hipster haven.”

 

31 October 2018 Wednesday Halloween

My gut has been upset for a couple of days and last night about 1:30 it work me up that I had to get up and have some crackers hoping that would sooth things out. I stayed up until 3 in the morning before finally dropping back off to sleep. Dogs wanted me up at 7:30 so gave them a treat, made come coffee and a bowl of oatmeal although I couldn’t eat much of it. I also made two loaves of banana nut bread from the three bananas that getting over ripe.

Happy Samhain to my Pagan friends. As the old year becomes the new year remember your ancestors. Thirty Years ago on this day Connell O'Donovan and I created the Gay and Lesbian Historical Society of Utah the first of its kind to preserve the stories of our Queer Ancestors.

 

NOVEMBER

 

1 November 2018 Thursday

It was a wet misty morning. It must have rained all night for everything to be so wet. I went on line and sent Kyle’s transcripts  from SLCC to Indiana State University. I had to dig through documents and letters I had saved of his to find his student ID number S00211138. His other transcripts had to wait because I had to be over at Bill Poore’s to pick him up to go out to eat. We went out to lunch on this dreary wet day and tried a new place called Shanghai Cafe on 13th and State. It was new to us but had been around over 25 years. I never ate there before because I thought it was just vegetarian. I had something I thought would be light on my stomach a meatball pho soup...it was good but way too much with the rice noodles...I'd go back I think,  but I’d order just a cup of soup rather than a bowl. Bill paid me another $100 . He was all excited to tell me that he met up with his old friend Marilyn Caskey, who performs on Broadway. They were at the University of Utah at the same time in the early 70’s and performed in theater productions there together. She’s back to teach some classes at the U of U. After eating we drove by the Fortitude Halfway house on 9^th West and 17^th South where Kyle will be going in December. I wanted to see for myself where it was and to show Bill how close Kyle will be to home. Afterwards we went to the White Trash Smith’s on 9^th West and 8^th South so he could get some bottled water and I got some gizzards for the pups. Putting away all the Jack O Lanterns and Halloween accoutrements for another year... I still have pumpkins to make pie filling for the upcoming holidays...I love Halloween and thanksgiving but Christmas is so anti-climactic... not my favorite holiday except for the lights...I love the lights. Chili and corn bread on this damp All Saints Day... it's certainly soup and chili weather now

·         YOUR ORDER DATE: 11/01/2018 1:31 PM ET UR SCHOOL: Salt Lake Community College (005220-00) RECIPIENT: INDIANA STATE UNIVERSITY RECIPIENT EMAIL: admissions@indstate.edu TRANSCRIPT SENT: 11/01/2018 1:51 PM ET TRANSCRIPT RETRIEVED: 11/02/2018 9:09 AM ET  Transcript order 35443143

 

2 November 2018 Friday

I took Coco down to be groomed this morning and   I went and had my own hair cut too. When I went to pick her up I brought in Maxx to have his nails clipped. I read a new English murder mystery series with the main character named Agatha Raisin... When I finished reading Death By Quiche it made me hungry for one...and since no one could accuse me of being a "real Man" I figured it's okay for me to eat quiche. I made two spinach and ham pies because how can you make just one? One will go in the freezer i suppose. Chopped fresh spinach, chopped ham, chopped purple onion, chopped red and green bell peppers, chopped green onions, provolone, Swiss, and cheddar cheeses, a pinch of salt, white pepper, all spice covered with an egg, milk, and sour cream batter...I also downloaded some transcript applications for Kyle and mailed them off to him. It was Such a beautiful fall day that I raked up leaves on my front steps and driveway and off the back deck... Didn't go crazy because more are sure to fall when you have over 30 trees in one’s yard. I still have a bit of a stomach issue. I wonder if medical marijuana would help. I sent out a message about having a Thanksgiving get together for Wednesday 21^st.

 

3 November 2018 Saturday

I went to bed about ten last night because I wanted to get up early to go see Kyle and tell him about the transcripts I sent off for him. I woke up at about 1 because of the dogs and the wind was blowing. When I let Buddy down the steps I smelled a skunk somewhere. Maybe that was what the pups were excited about. I got up at 6 pm made some coffee took a shower and was off by 7 am. Our visiting time was 7:45-9:15. I told Kyle to look in the mail for the letter I sent him with information about filling out transcripts requests and then we just visited. He is getting anxious about the transfer to Fortitude and had his interview last Tuesday. He also said he had a nice Halloween as he went to some prison officer’s parties and loaded up on candy and pizza. He said he was surprised to hear so many of the women secretaries saying favorable things about the Marijuana initiative. I worked on my presentation for the year 1988 for next Wednesday. Trying to condense is a bitch.

 

4 November 2018 Sunday

I have major Attention Deficiency today...I needed to work on my Wednesday presentation but instead I made homemade tomato basil soup from my left-over garden, sat in the hot tub, posted a blog of my journal from 1988 and having a grilled ham and cheese sandwich with my soup either as a late lunch or early supper...it's been a gloomy Sunday.

 

5 November 2018 Monday

No matter how much you hate changing the clocks at least little school children are no longer walking to school and crossing streets in the dark... and the sun is again directly positioned correctly at noon. We should keep Standard Time and do away with Daylight Savings...who cares if the wealthy get an extra hour to play golf? America has a short attention span... a year ago a white domestic terrorist murdered a bunch of church goers... but white men must have their AK 15 to feel masculine so to them the slaughter of innocents is just collateral damage... vote because your life may depend on it.

6 November 2018 Tuesday

Well the elections are done and the marijuana proposition passed but sure to be gutted by the Mormon legislature. The congressional race between Mia Love and Ben McAdams is too close to call but Ben is slightly ahead but that doesn’t mean anything as the Utah County votes are still out. Of course Congressional Democrats lost everywhere else. The best news is that the Democrats nationally have taken back the House of Representatives although the Senate is still controlled by the criminals. I voted by mail awhile back and didn’t watch the results figuring they would all change by tomorrow. I did hear Beto O’Rourke lost his Senate race to Cruz in Texas. That was disappointing. The Utah anti gerrymandering bill is also too close to call.

 

7 November 2018 Wednesday

Home from the noon Gay Men Sack Lunch at the Pride Center...what good positive energy that place has... rejuvenated me every time I go down there. I had to return to the center for my monthly history lesson tonight. Charles Bigo and TJ and Jim weren’t at my presentation but there was a pretty good turn out anyway to hear about 1988. I brought Gingerbread and Chocolate Chip cookies. Orange County, California, the county I grew up in has elected a bunch of Democrats. I lived there from 1953 until 1973 and off and on until moving permanently to Utah in 1985... after growing up in Orange County I thought Utah was liberal in comparison lol...but I was always and ever shall be a Democrat as I learned at an early age that Republicans were mean people. The first election I could vote in was in 1970 and I voted for Jesse Unruh a Democrat for California governor. Reagan won and he destroyed the public school system and hurt the working middle class. We must not despair over Democratic loses this year as that . 26 House committees that are now under Democratic control. Jefferson Beauregard Sessions is now in the dustbin of history. Trump fired him today. There was another mass shooting ... this time in California among young people just out for a good time at the Borderline Bar and Grill.

·         Barbara Danforth Nadsady This one is close to home. My daughter, Jenna, and her band have performed on that stage many times. I have been in that building with family and friends on numerous occasions. This is terrible, horrific, heartbreaking.

·         Benedgar Williams Barbara Danforth Nadsady so horrible... glad none of your kids were there that night and hopefully none of their friends... how traumatic... I was once robbed at gun point when working by myself and shoved in to a utility closet to be shot when the robbers were scared off... it's something you never forget

·         Barbara Danforth Nadsady I’m so sorry that happened to you.

 

8 November 2018 Thursday

Home from attending an intergenerational dinner at the Pride Center sponsored by SAGE... there were about 5 people there over 60 and about 20 under 25, a lot of teenagers... . SAGE is an organization for Gay Elders specifically so that's why it was called intergenerational but it appeared to be more of a youth group activity...I think the free pizza brought them out. I was asked to attend and sat with Greg Hardin who was in full drag as Tracey Aviary... I am getting too old to be out 2 nights in a row... Debbie Hall who runs SAGE asked me to attend the event which is held nationally by other SAGE chapters. It must have been more promoted among the youth because of the lack of seniors in attendance but I think it was an event for youths to talk to some seniors. Greg Hardin and Joni Weiss were the only ones out of the others invited. I guess it was an invite only event all though there were more than 12 youth participants. There were only 3 tables set up with about 8 people at each table. There was an Iranian Trans named Emily who was a youth anti-gun activist and a young man “of color” named Salvador who was a lobbyist in Washington sitting at the table. It was interesting listening to the issues of the young people there but I took exception when Emily stated as it was a fact that the Stonewall Riots was started by Trans Women of Color. I was polite but I could not let that misinformation stand without correcting it. I kind of  upset Emily when she said to me so you don't believe that Trans People of Color started the Stonewall Riot and I said yes... they didn’t... I gave her the details that Bill Poore gave me about Yvonne Ritter, Marsha P Johnson, and Sylvia Rivera... these Trans POC want to erase "cis" white men from our history. It seemed to me that young activists are almost as homophobic against those they call “cis-gender white males.”  I know I am just old fashioned but this new term of Intersectionality just seems to be a rehash of the old “I am not Gay I am a human being” crap. It truly diminishes Gay as being the primary identity. It’s like saying I’m not merely black I am all these other things. That may be true but when the Gay or Black identity is what is being used to degrade and denigrate then it should be the primary focus and everything else secondary. The latest buzz word intersectionality, which the more I hear it the more I call bullshit... it's being used to mean that besides being any of the flavors of LGBTQ+ one is also many other facet identities... reminds me of all those who used to say they’re a human being first ... well duh... not me I will always be Gay first and all other aspects are secondary...a Gay man, a Gay retired teacher, a Gay activist, a Gay historian as opposed to being a man, a retired teacher, an activist, or a historian who just happens to also be Gay...intersectionality seems to be just another ploy of assimilationists and homophobes who want to denigrate being Gay...

·         Debbie Hall wrote “If you are not familiar with this event, it is basically designed to bring together youth and elders from our community, provide dinner and have conversation in an attempt to cross the generational lines. There are pre-determined questions and talking points to help the conversation flow smoothly. I have five adults already lined up and I need one more person. Would you be interested in being our 6th person? The event will be held at the Utah Pride Center. Two representatives from the youth programming department will be there, 12 youth participants, myself and six elders. The people who will be participating from our SAGE group are Joni Weiss, Karma Wayman, Kim Pederson, Tanya Hawkins and Greg Hardin.”

·         Bill Poore Yvonne escaped out the bathroom window, Marsha and Sylvia came after it was started...street kids started it....for years they said a black lesbian threw the first brick, then it became a tran….one thing is clear poor gay white men are really included with a lot of very fucked people.

 

9 November 2018 Friday

Mike was off today so he took old Buster and me down to have his nails clipped as his dew claws were getting pretty long. Mike took us down because I wanted to hold Buster and while trying to pick him up, he bit me pretty hard, poor scared boy but at the groomer he was sweet and mellow... I have to take him down again tomorrow at 1030 because his rabies vaccination expire 3 days ago... hopefully I won't get bit again... everyone fussed over him ... he is a sweet old boy ... he just had been traumatized a year ago when dumped in a box up a cold canyon by some bastard. Buster is 180 degrees better at trusting, he sleeps with me, greets company, will take treats, eats with the others now, but when he gets nervous he goes to his hiding places where his back is to the wall...it's only then he reverts back to being scared ... while he lets me pet him he snaps at me if I try to pick him up... he must have been severely abused so I always give him special attention and hands on massages which he loves... After that Mike and I went to Chubby’s for lunch and I ended up taking half of my lunch home. Didn’t do much else but catch up on some of my programs on Hulu before heading to bed. The Malibu California fire  is out of control and people are told to evacuate along the Pacific Coast Highway. Cher's house is in the path of the Malibu fire. Caitlyn Jenner's house has already burned so I heard...Another fire in Northern California wiped out the town of Paradise. I got a notice that the episode of when I was interviewed in Albuquerque last April was to air tonight on the Discovery Channel which I don’t have because I don’t have cable. The show was on the Deadly Women Series 12 Episode 8 -‘Jilted and Jealous’ (Jean Sinclair, Paula Angel, Rena Salmon). I was told they would be sending me a DVD copy of the show once it had aired.

·         To Robert Moolman I haven’t forgotten the Kristen Ries project... i am still getting stragglers who are sending me their pictures so I’d like to use what they prefer over the pics i have... hope you have a great Thanksgiving

·         Robert Moolman No stress. I know that it is in the perfect pair of hands. I am trying to flee the Center and LGBTQ politics for a week. Did you know our community enjoys eating each other instead of keeping the eye on the prize!? Shock?! I am taking the poor hubby out of town, but so excited by the amazing things that are happening at the Center this week.

·         Me Lots of dysfunctional broken people who lash out however we have a lot of Sterling people here ... just separate the goats from the sheep... and don't take anything personal... you are just a focal point ... you  are tremendous so go out and renew your energy to fight the good fight...

·         Robert Love ya Ben Williams. That is all so true

·         Me- Mutual admiration society

 

10 November 2018 Saturday

So frustrating these unannounced brief little power outages that only last less than a minute but wipes out anything you are working on. I lost about an hour and a half of writings in my journal this morning because of it. Mike came by a little after 10 to take Buster and me to the vet at the Dog Park. It was his first visit since I adopted him a year ago... he needed his rabies and other shots...the vet said his left eye was infected and had a lesion on it that I have to put medicine in and that one of his back leg’s patella had come off and causes him to limp a bit... I got pain pills for that too... his heart and temperature are good but I have to put him on a diet... he was really Good for the vet...a very good boy. When I came home from the vet I spent two and a half hours, mowing the front yard, cleaning out the flower beds for the snow that is sure to come, and blowing all the leaves off my steps and driveway... still more to do...maybe tomorrow if the weather holds... Mike gave Lulubelle a soft harness that Coco had out grown so I had to take her for a long walk too... the vet said I had to put Buster on a diet so I think all the pups are going to have to go on one... it will not be a happy house for a while I think and I think there will be a boycott. Democrats elected 8 new scientists this midterm. Republicans elected 3 felons and a dead pimp. And people still say there's no difference between the parties

 

11 November 2018 Sunday

I woke up at 5:00 this morning because of the dogs and decided to just stay up because Kyle’s visiting time was at 7:45. At dawn I saw this soldier carrying a flag standing at attention on the 2300 North overpass on 215. I heard later he stood there on this the 100th Anniversary of Armistice Day. There weren’t many visitors this morning and Kyle and I had a good visit. I told him that I had his letter with his transcript request come yesterday and I’d get them mailed out with checks after Veterans Day. He said that he’d probably not be going to Fortitude any sooner than December 4^th and he’s getting super anxious about leaving Draper but also that his requests for financial aid from Vocational Rehab comes in time to help pay his tuition. We talked about the election results and other things I had attended this past week before the time was up. Jenny this woman I have become friendly with who visits her husband Sean at the same time I do told me that there was a McDonalds and a short cut to the freeway that I never knew about. I followed her to McDonalds because she needed a coke and I ordered an egg McMuffin that I had had in years. To my surprise she paid for my sandwich when she paid for her drink. I didn’t do much else today because I was tired but I did finish my article for my Lambda Lore column in the Q finally. I did go to the library to return the Agatha Raisin CD I had finished and I checked out a mystery called Death Overdue ...I wanted something to read as that the library would be closed tomorrow. I read in bed until I thought it was at least 9 o'clock and it was only 7... I am such an old man... speaking of being old Buster has been really good about letting me put an antibiotic salve in his eye... they are all on my newly clean bed... I wonder how long that will last with 5 dogs sleeping with me. Bill said he wasn’t coming over tomorrow for pot roast because he wasn’t feeling well and just wanted to stay in bed. I was disappointed but also okay with not fixing a dinner. Finished my article for my Lambda Lore column in the Q finally...I've been reading a new mystery and I thought it was at least 9 o'clock and its only 7....

·         Bill Poore Ben I am going to pass on tomorrow....I wanted to put flowers on my father’s grave. I drove over was really struggling. I am back home in bed drinking hot tea. I just don't want to overdo it tomorrow. I want to keep the day open because I might go see a doctor at the VA....I just don't have an appetite....I don't want you drive over here either, you just don't need to do that. I have plenty of water, tea, coffee and bread, soup...so I am fine. I just want to stay in bed, play on my lap top and sleep. I love pot roast but to be honest my stomach just can’t handle it. Thanks my friend

 

12 November 2018 Monday

I should not be left alone with an oven... I made 2 banana bread loaves and a loaf of cinnamon bread for no particular reason...

 

13 November 2018 Tuesday

It’s been over a week and they’re still counting votes for Utah’s 4^th District Election between Ben McAdams and Mia Love.

 

14 November 2018 Wednesday

Every one snuggled in this morning as Maxx eats the rest of my oatmeal that Buster didn't finish... I'm relegated to the edge of the bed with Buddy hogging the center, TJ on my legs and Lulubelle at my feet...anti-social Harleigh likes to be off on his own unless he's frightened... I went down to the Pride Center for the Gay Men’s Sack Lunch and brought a tray of dark chocolate brownies I made yesterday. It was a small bunch about 5 of us... Went out at 7 to hear Chad Anderson's Voices Heard at the Sugar Space Arts Warehouse over at 8^th West... I was tired but I wanted to support Chad and it was only $6.50  I like being told a story but the two women readers just didn’t engage me... Tomorrow going to Hillcrest High School to see the Musical Hairspray... I saw the John Waters movie 30 years ago long before any of these high school kids were born...should be fun seeing singing and dancing musical theater kids... then Friday seeing Afterglow which is supposed to include the full Monte lol... I will need the weekend to recuperate from 3 days of being out at night..." when I was younger for night life I use to hunger...I sleep easier now" Cole Porter was right. President Trump did not attend Veterans Day services at Arlington National Cemetery marking the 100th anniversary of the end of World War I, but representatives of the French government did. Explain that you horrible Trump supporters.

 

15 November 2018 Thursday

Happy to share my hot cereal with Buster on this chilly morn... TJ is scratching for me to lift into bed and Harleigh is barking because well.. he likes to bark in the morning. I haven't been to Costco for over a year...so I went to see what they had for dogs and $140 later came out with a huge box of Kirkland Dog Biscuits, 24 cans of Kirkland canned food, 30 Caesar Dog food for Lulubelle, a box of grain free organic dog biscuits, a bag of dried chicken strips made in USA, same with some beef strips, I did buy some pecans for holiday baking, some trail mix and a $9 pair of bedroom slippers... good thing I only go once a year... people in Costco will run you down if you or too slow or will block the aisle if they start gabbing with someone. The Kirkland turkey and peas in gravy dog food wasn't a big hit... oh well the diet will begin... I am sure Buddy or Harleigh will have a midnight snack on left overs... I have 24 cans of it so they better get off their high horse... the vet said not to feed them just chicken thighs and gizzards... they all want a second opinion. Made some dark chocolate cupcakes before heading off to see Hairspray... I am Donating them to Gay Bingo tomorrow after I frost them and put chopped pecans on them. I am giving them two loaves of banana bread I had in the freezer too... The fund raiser is for Kids with Cancer this month. Home from one of the best high school musicals I had ever seen...Hillcrest High School performed Hair Spray with some really excellent vocal talent and super high energy... there were over 200 students dancing on stage or the aisle not counting the orchestra and main cast, and set designers... that's why it's important to support the performing arts in high schools... The play started at 7 so Mike and I left the house at 6 pm but once we came upon the 72^nd South exit The FWY  was so back we had to get off on to State Street. The parking lot was crazy full but we managed to find Alan and Kyle who was already with TJ and Jim. Richard hadn’t shown up so I told the rest I would wait for him and he barely got there 2 minutes before the doors closed. We sat right behind the orchestra and the voices of the main cast were incredible and even had a boy playing Edna Turnblad in drag and the boy playing Edna Turnblad was so cute... but then so were most of the dancing boys.., our Gay future is in good hands. It was a super fun evening and my group was amazed and surprised how much talent was on stage. Roy Clark, the legendary guitarist and singer, Country Music Hall of Fame and Grand Ole Opry member, Grammy, ACM and CMA award winner and co-host of the “Hee Haw” television series, died today at the age of 85 due to complications from pneumonia at home in Tulsa, Okla.

·         Alan Anderson Very enjoyable production. I think many in the audience did not care for the "liberal" slant, but oh well, they need some enlightenment.

·         Doug Murri Welcome to the 60's  Ooops! I meant to say, Welcome to Utah. Those damn radical, liberal, leftist, hair hoppers!

·         Jesse Dolce There is a gay walking group that meets every Sunday. They walk liberty park then go to brunch then go to Costco. I love the group. We walk at 9 am on Sunday. Meet at Barbacoa at 9th and 9th. Walk twice around Liberty Park. Then meet at Par Cafe at 10am, followed by Costco at noon, followed by a possible movie around 2 or 4. Great group of guys. You are welcome to join all or any small portion of the events. Best part is there is a chance someone is willing to split some of the Costco purchases with you. Great cardio workout as you need to walk a  good pace to make it around Liberty Park twice in 60 minutes. The same group meets on Wednesday night to walk the park and then go get something to eat after. Sunday is a much more relaxed time to go to Costco. Plus it becomes so fabulous with a gaggle of gays.

 

16 November 2018 Friday

Turning into a busy week... I went and met Jesse Dolce at Smiths on 8^th and 9^th to hand over some pecan chocolate cupcakes and banana bread for Gay Bingo this morning ... then I came home baked a pumpkin to turn it into puree for pumpkin pies later. Tomorrow going down to see Kyle and Sunday seeing Boy Erased hopefully. Michael Aaron bought a block of tickets for an AIDS Foundation showing and was giving them out to Q writers and I said I wanted a pair so I can take Michael Romero. Monday I am meeting with Levon my Armenian asylum seeker who I haven't seen in almost a year. We are meeting at Chubby’s at 1 pm. I guess he was granted asylum or he wouldn’t still be here. Tuesday I will be baking pies and taking Buster down for a Dental Examination at the Spay and Neuter Clinic but I forgot I also have an eye exam for him that day at the Pet Shop vet. Wednesday having a pre-Thanksgiving Dinner at the house and Thursday I am bringing some baked ham down to the Pride Center for their dinner .... Friday I get to collapse. Mike came by at 5:30 to pick me up for another night at the theater with the boys. The show wasn’t until 7:30 but we wanted to go into town to find parking before it got crazy and get something to eat. We walked along 300 South to find something and we settled on eating at a hamburger joint called Rich’s. I just shared Michael’s fries while he ordered a pastrami hamburger. There seemed to be a lot of street people tucked into the nooks and crannies of buildings bundled up in the cold air. How did we ever get to this? Thirty years ago Broadway was just filled with Gays cruising at night not the homeless. I gave $4 which was all I had on me to a man who asked for change who had a small terrier dog. I am a sucker for anyone with a homeless dog. Anyway Alan Anderson and Richard and Dwight Wood were already at the Rose Wagner and we were basically the first in and sat in the front row with TJ and Jim. Others I saw there were Jim Dabakis, Doug Wortham, and his partner. Michelle Turpin was there as a power dyke with her latest girlfriend. I really don’t like her. Anyway the show was about how a three way broke up a relationship between two Gay men who were married. Same old story only the married Gays were having a kid. Lots of nudity and sexual situations more than I thought. Who would have thought I’d live long enough to see it up close and personal in theater? I’ve had a Gay theme going on this fall. In October saw viva la divas Halloween show, the Rocky Horror Show, Hair Spray, and now Afterglow... which was not a musical but the naked guys made up for the lack of singing and dancing... Afterglow I guess is completely sold out... I got a letter from Kyle letting me know what he will need when he’s transferred to Fortitude.

·         Stephanie Williams You dear cousin are a wonderful person. What a great community and circle of friends you have.

·         Richard Harmston I think there are still a few tickets left for the last two performances of Afterglow, which were added a few days ago. Gelman has a new play opening soon off Broadway. It is called Safe Word, about the BDSM community. .

·          Benedgar Williams I am too vanilla 🤣

·         Beau Chaine' Good Lord, you mean you didn't sneak your cell phone in for pics? LOL

·         Benedgar Williams It was pretty extreme even for an old reprobate like me LOL Who'd thought I'd live long enough to see naked simulated Gay male sex on the stage. I almost got the vapors. It certainly wasn't an Aardvark Cabaret show LOL. Everyone in the audience would have been arrested along with the actors and put in a paddy wagon back then

 

17 November 2018 Saturday

I went down to Draper to see Kyle at 1 pm. We had a good visit and there were a lot of visitors so I had to sit next to Kevin, who visits Craig Crawford. After wards when it was time to leave for some reason I felt like I needed to hug Craig…Such a pitiful tragic figure. Strange I don’t know why. Perhaps because I realized that Kyle was leaving in a few weeks and he will be here the rest of his life. It was cold today and damp. I later reflected on my life. I have my home, my pups, my friends and family, and my health. I have much to be grateful for this Thanksgiving Season. I have enough. Two years ago today I was asked to foster "Cupcake". I was a failure and adopted her and can’t imagine Lulubelle not being a part of my little troop. I was told at the time she was a surrender because her owners did not have time for her...She was about 5 years old... I wrote at the time "We [the pups and I] will see how it goes and hopefully get her into a good home who has time for her. The best way I can honor Lucky, Daisy and Farley is by helping these little sweet hearts find good homes." I was such a sucker. How could I let her go? I renamed her Lulu Belle after adopting her.

 

18 November 2018 Sunday

Michael Aaron had tickets for Michael and I for an Utah AIDS Foundation showing of Boy Erased at the Broadway...it looked like a full house and Stan Penfold addressed the audience before the showing about how stigma affects the Gay community with HIV and suicide...the movie was powerful but I've been fighting religious bigotry here in Utah for over 32 years so nothing new under the sun...in fact I was there to protest the 1st Evergreen reparation therapy conference here in SLC in 1989 when I was told to be nice and I said no... I saw Jim Dabakis at the theater and gave him a hug and then later thought how strange it was for me to have hugged Craig Crawford who Jim hates for murdering his friend John Williams. I enjoyed the movie but it didn’t have a real impact on me since I am so far removed from letting my life be controlled by religion. Just because Evangelical haters claim to be Christian don't believe them...lots of evil men claim to be Christian even Jim Jones who 40 years ago led over 900 people to their deaths.

 

19 November  2018 Monday

Doing my baking this morning … I made  4 pumpkin pies and made pumpkin bread from left over batter. I made them all from a pumpkin I grew... I cooked them in homemade pie crusts that I put in aluminum pie tins so I can just give them away ... I am having a pre-Thanksgiving on Wednesday and will bring some of the pies to the Pride Day on Thursday for those who don't want to eat Vegan gluten free pies lol. I met with Levon my Armenian asylum seeker for lunch and was so happy he was granted asylum last January and in this January he can apply for his green card... when I was asked to put him up 4 years ago he was just learning English and the condition for him to be put on an asylum list was that he could not work... in Armenia he was being persecuted because he was Gay and had been in some student protests against the government so I gave him room and board for 6 months until his status changed and he was able to get a work permit... now he has his own place, owns a car, has a driver's license, pays income taxes, and is more comfortable expressing himself as a young Gay man. He has been dating and meeting people on Tindr and Grindr aps. He’s been out of work though for two months now and wants to go back to school and get a master’s in social work. He told me something I didn’t know before that he had been diagnosed as having Post Traumatic Stress syndrome. That explains a lot. November must be the month I adopt dogs. Three years ago today I brought home one very sweet dog that I had sprung from jail...he was picked up in West Valley on a vagrancy charge... He was in the pokey Until I paid his bail and brought him home to join Daisy and Buddy... Bill Poore named him Lucky but I was the Lucky one...he would not go to bed until I did... He had to be by my side always...I lost this sweet boy in February 2016. Ben McAdams surprisingly seems to have won the 4^th District House Seat but with less than a 1000 votes.

·         Richard P. Butler Proof that not only you’re a great person but compassionate as well.

·         Barbara Danforth Nadsady Awesome. 😘

·         Craig Hunter Nice

·         Greg Allen Is he single? God bless you, Ben.

·         Benedgar Williams Greg Allen why yes he is and will be 29 in January

·         Curtis Jensen Thank you Ben - it's good to see that your heart has remained one of your most wonderful characteristics.

·         Benedgar Williams Curtis Jensen thank you Curtis... I am glad our paths crossed ... places are better off because of you

 

20 November 2018 Tuesday

Decided to make a Pecan Pie for tomorrow’s dinner. Had to make mom's pecan pie... because it wouldn't be Thanksgiving without it ..Thanksgiving is not special without Pecan Pie. The only difference was instead of using Karo corn syrup I used pancake syrup which is just maple flavored Karo. I did all my chopping and prepping this morning so tomorrow I just have to coordinate everything. I cut the ham into slices to bring to the center on Thursday along with some pumpkin pies. In the afternoon Buster was such a good boy taking him down to Spay and Neuter Clinic in Murray to have a dental examination but the vet said he's got to lose 2 pounds before they will do any dental work on him... he's going to hate going on a diet ... he's such a different dog than a year ago... he knows he's safe and loved. I am feeding everyone a fourth a cup of chopped chicken and a fourth cup of Kirkland canned dog food except for Buddy he gets a 1/2 cup chicken and 1/2 cup of door food... tough love... Lulubelle looks at me like Oliver and says "more please"... but I am a rock... let them eat dry if they are still hungry... we have gone Spartan. Well not exactly because I give Lulubelle and Max Caesar dog food.

 

21 November 2018 Wednesday

Busy morning because I am having a pre-Thanksgiving Dinner... did a lot of prep work yesterday so it's just a matter of timing it all. I bought a turkey breast that I buttered and stuffed with my sage before roasting it, and glazed part of the ham, the majority of which will go to the center, with apricot jam, cloves, and maple syrup. I also made cornbread dressing, mash potatoes, turkey gravy, candied yam, sweet corn, and roasted butter squash. I bought some artisan dinner rolls, but made a pumpkin pie, a pecan pie, and pumpkin bread. TJ Otaka brought a green bean casserole and a cranberry relish dish. Bill Poore brought me a pretty poinsettia. I had Alan Anderson, Mike Romero, Bill Poore, TJ and Jim McMullin,  my gaggle of Gays, over for a nice pre-Thanksgiving Dinner. I guess Kyle Daniels is down in Las Vegas and won’t be in until tomorrow so that is why Alan joined us. The dogs were all well behaved and Buster even let Jim and T.J. Otaka pet him... we had a good time visiting and as always Bill regaled us with his stories of being in the theater. Dinner was at 1 and people started leaving at 5 so I sent everyone home with lots of left overs... we had a Gay old time... After cleaning up a little I attended Terry Gillman's new Gay Men’s discussion group at the Pride Center... there must have been 20 men for the first meeting... I really enjoyed it, listening to people talk and share about relationships ... Hummingbird who facilitated the group did a great job. And a great thanks to Terry for his  vision and commitment to our tribe... I felt renewed. I heard that West Wendover has legalized recreation Cannabis. I wonder how they will keep it out of Utah. Drug sniffing dogs at a Check point Charlie? ... got to keep Utahns under control... God forbid we have free agency to use a natural herb when we can overdose to the max on profitable opioids

 

22 November 2018 Thursday Thanksgiving

I am Thankful this day that my pups are well and that Buster has finally accepted us as part of his pack. I have never seen him cuddle with Lulubelle before like he did this morning...the diet however is not working out very well as he won’t eat the Kirkland Brand dog I bought and Harleigh and Buddy have been waking me up at 3 am running around and barking until I get up and give them a doggy treat... then the rest get up wanting a snack too and then I’m wide awake. At least I am not cooking a big meal today...I just heated up and glazed a tray of ham, that Bill Poore had bought me last Christmas, to bring over to the Pride Center for those who don't have a place to go today. I also brought two pumpkin pies. There is another Romaine Lettuce scare so I say bring a nice Caesar Salad to your crazy ass Republican relatives for Thanksgiving...if they say anything just shout Fake News! It was raining when we got to the center but I had our food covered. Mike and I had a nice time and there was plenty of food... some was good, some was Vegan... I told Mike you could smell the curry wafting in the air lol... but I found a few things to eat ... a lot of people do not know how to cook traditionally and think that making something exotic makes it good. This one kid brought in a pan of garlic mashed potatoes instead of regular mashed potatoes. My old friend Mike Pipkim was like that always coming up with some weird combination and thinking it was haute cuisine. Someone made a cranberry dressing that was inedible. Debbie Hill who is in charge of SAGE bless her heart cooked the turkeys although she is a Vegan. Mike said however there wasn’t much flavor to them. Probably did not know how to season them properly but everyone seemed to enjoy the food and there were  lots of desserts. I had some Fruit Cake that was good but really rich. SAGE did a really nice job and Liz Pitts and the Center’s staff did also... it was good to see such a mixed crowd. We sat with Kevin Scott and his husband Jose, and Matthew Wilson who Ive known for years. We all had fun... it was enjoyable for sure...Mike and I left about 2 after spending a couple of hours down there. Fifty-five years ago I was sitting in my 4th period science class in 7th grade when an announcement came over the classroom speaker that the President of the United States had been shot and killed. At that point, the world seemed to make no sense. All the teachers were crying or somber and all thoughts of teaching ceased. It was as if they were in shock... it seemed too surreal to stay in school so at lunch a friend and I ditched and walked the mile home where I hoped to bring familiarity back to an upside down world... then on the B & W television we watched the news of Jack Ruby killing Harvey Oswald at the Dallas police station, the horse drawn carriage with the flag draped coffin with little John John saluting... it was a crazy time to just becoming a teenager... everyone over 10 who was alive then remembers exactly where they were and how they felt when our Camelot President was killed. No wonder my generation in the 1960s trusted no one and tuned in, turned on, and dropped out. Trump defends and has admiration for murderous billionaire thugs, like Kim Un, Putin, and Salman... makes you wonder about him...after all birds of a feather flock together. Donald Trump said on Thanksgiving that there would be "bedlam, chaos, injury and death" if the federal judiciary did not give him his way on immigration policy. Any clearer indication that Trump wants dictatorial powers? Democrats are fussing over Nancy Pelosi. I support her. She was able to pass ACA in Congress when no one else could have... she is smart enough to know you can't go faster than the electorate is willing to go... we need experience in these troubled times.

 

23 November 2018 Friday

Is it just me or is anyone else having oven withdrawals? I feel like my oven should be turned to 375 degrees & something baking. I put on a crock pot of Bean and ham soup for this late November supper. Simple foods are often the best food. I Spent the morning putting the December Holiday crap outside while the weather still holds. I like to get the outside done before the inside...I even put chili peppers over my lights which I haven't done in years because it's usually too cold to take the time to attach them. I even took apart and cleaned the glass in my porch and garage lanterns. Now let it snow I don't care. I went to Lucky’s and also bought more chicken and found a good deal on dates. I had a letter from Kyle today asking if I’d buy him a pair of Wrangler relax fit Jeans. He’s getting very anxious for his release to Fortitude. I took Buster in for a check up on his eye at 2:30 and did not get out for nearly an hour and a half ...the lesion is healing but not healed completely so they made a serum plus other drops I have to put drops in 4 times a day into his left eye... good news is he has lost a half a pound...I have to go in again next Wednesday at 11:30 for another exam...this visit was only $100 with the exam and medicine... he was as good as he could be for his checkup waiting all that time for them to make the serum... Mike brought back finally all my food containers... I was running low...now I have tons again. I watched Night of the Hunter; the only movie Charles Laughton ever directed. It was on Filmstruck which will go off the air on the 29^th. It is such a great channel that I am really going to miss it.

 

24 November 2018 Saturday

I went to bed around 10:00 after reading from a murder mystery novel called Read and Gone as part of series about a ghost in the library. At 1:00 the dogs all woke me up and I gave them some treats and then went back to bed but the howling wind and the rain coming down in sheets woke me several times too. I woke this morning to snow falling... I am glad I did all my outside decorating yesterday and had made a crock of soup. I got up at 6 am to see about an inch of wet snow on the deck. I made some mocha coffee and sausage and pancakes. The pups ended up with all the sausages and most of the pancakes as I ordered a pair of Wrangler jeans for Kyle for $39 and free shipping. It was the best price because of the free shipping. Then I dragged out the fiber optic Xmas tree and the rest of the holiday paraphernalia this morning. My manger scene, Xmas’s wreath, and things I have kept over the years. Am not decorating a tree this year. Just enough stuff out to be cheery. Rich Butler wanted to come over this morning and we visited for about two hours. I think I am his sounding board because he shares all his domestic issues about Brenda’s family with me knowing that I always take his side. He talked about all the upcoming events he will be doing for the Holidays and I let him vent and was so glad I am single LOL, If you can call living with six pups single. After he left to go see Brenda’s uncle up at the VA hospital I went down to DI to look around and bought some more Tupperware stuff and some big coffee mugs and a cupcake tin. Then went to the Smith’s on 9^th and found some gizzards there finally for the pups. On the way home I bought a small loaf of bread at the Family Tree dollar store ... never tried it before but it was small and just the right size... I rarely buy a loaf of bread anymore because they are huge and I never am able to eat it all in a month of Sundays...freezing bread just fills up the freezer and you have to unthaw it when you just want a peanut butter and jelly sandwich... if it's awful I will do what reportedly Marie Antoinette said to do when told that the people had no bread...Let them eat cake... the cupcakes I made in my case  I finished reading my book Read and Gone and decided to go down to the prison to see Kyle. Our visiting time was from 6:30 until 8:00 pm and it was dark and cold but with a beautiful bright moon shining over the Wasatch. I let him know I ordered his pants and we just talked about how we spent our Thanksgivings. He said that he and Craig Crawford had been talking about the Utah Queer History Project and about funding anonymously an oral history project. That was out of the blue. Kyle said that  Craig was interested in anonymously using some of his money to fund such a project. Kyle wants me to come next weekend on Sunday again at 6:30 because he thinks he might know by then if he will be released on Tuesday the 4^th or Tuesday the 11^th.

 

25 November 2018 Sunday

Quite chilly today but with bright blue skies. I corrected and read over much of my journal this morning but did little else except write Kyle a letter in which I enclosed the email information from his yahoo account about Indiana State. I went to the library this afternoon to return a book and check out some more while I am waiting for the books I’ve requested to come in. I spent much of the day reading Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s Vampire Stories. On December 15th Saturday I am planning on having a little get together for my friends  with soups, breads and desserts before the Holidays gets to crazy. Nothing fancy kind of  a drop in if you can make it 5 to 8... America is now tear gassing refugees.

 

26 November 2018 Monday

Its late in the month and since it wasn’t too bad outside I used the leaf blower to clean up some of the leaves from the steps and driveway that came down with the latest storm. I made some oatmeal raisin cookies but that was as productive as I got today.

 

27 November 2018 Tuesday

I began posting my 1989 Journal on a blog to put it out on the internet. It will soon be thirty years old. However in the afternoon I decided to go see Bohemian Rhapsody about the life of Freddie Mercury of Queen. Rich Butler posted that I needed to see it so since it was a matinee it only cost $5. I went to the 1 o clock showing of the Century 16 theater on 33^rd South and state. I was so surprised by the reclining seats the theater had put in. I am so not contemporary any more. I really enjoyed Bohemian Rhapsody perhaps maybe because it was from my generation. Rami Malak was incredible. When I came home it was damp and cloudy and was for the rest of the day. In fact I had to use my lights before 5 when I took Coco home. I made some stew in the evening and finished working on typing up my handwriting journal before calling it quits and go to bed with the dogs.

·         Deb Hall I loved the movie too. And I also love those seats. I take a blanket and get cozy like it's my living room! The only drawback is you still have to wear pants while you're in the theater!

·         Greg Allen Yeah, Cinemark (which operates Century and Sugar House) has made a big push for recliners in all their theaters in recent years. I love it! Don't even go to Megaplex anymore and can now avoid their general wholesome Mormon vibe and upright seats.

·         Benedgar Williams Greg Allen since I am hardly an upright citizen if I go to see a mainstream film it will be at Century 16 which I have been going to nearly 40 years when it was the Cinedome

 

28 November 2018 Wednesday

I had to take Buster in for a follow up on the lesion on his left eye at 11:30. It hadn't completely healed but so much better and I still have eye drops left. It started to drizzle rain over this way so instead of going to the Gay Men's Noon lunch I just stayed in enjoying some homemade stew and hot chocolate. I've been typing up my hand written journal from 1989 so that I can post it on line. It’s been thirty years soon and most people in it are either dead or too old to remember what I wrote about them ha! I attended a brief Utah Queer Historical Society at the Pride Center. I was late. It started at 6 and I thought it was meeting at 630. There was just only 4 of us, Connell O’Donovan, Becky Moss, Brandon Devlin, and me so I guess other people didn’t care to go out on this dark cold rainy evening. Connell and Becky decided to have a speaker come for a last Wednesday Meeting  in January. They are going to ask Dale Sheld an older gentleman who had been in a relationship with the same man since 1969. I was kind of put out by Becky’s take-charge attitude when I am supposed to be the moderator. Oh well. I wanted a half hour meeting before these speakers to present business and she objected but I was firm that we had to officially meet as a board. Earlier I checked Kyle’s emails for information from Indiana State to copy and send off to him. This is some of the information I sent him. University ID# is  991892432  student e-mail is  wfoote@sycamores.indstate.edu. His social security number is 529453820. Login name wfoote Password Kyle1979 Security questions What is your mother’s maiden name Turner What is your maternal grandmother’s maiden name Pritchard. I also sent his advisor an email letting him know Kyle’s situation:

Dear Mr. Pond. I am corresponding with you on behalf of Warren Kyle Foote 

University ID# is  991892432  student e-mail is  wfoote@sycamores.indstate.edu

My name is Ben Williams and I have been helping Mr. Foote apply for an online course in Construction Management. Our dilemma is that Mr. Foote is currently incarcerated in the Utah State Correction Facility in Draper Utah...inmate number 187422. He does not have access to a computer nor a phone currently however shortly in December he will be transferring to a halfway house where he will have phone access and a computer. He desires to complete as many courses as he is able once he is transferred. He already has an associate degree he completed while incarcerated. I visit him weekly and send him correspondence copies of email sent from Indiana State. He is a veteran and hopes to use some of his benefits to pay for his education.

I've been an intermediator for him with faculty and administrators at Salt Lake Community College. As soon as he is able in December I am sure he will be able to contact you himself although his transfer date has not been confirmed yet but it will be either December 4th or the 11th or the 18th at the latest.

I hope you can appreciate the restraints we are under and can find a way to accommodate this situation.

 

 

29 November 2018 Thursday

Today is my cousin Stephanie Williams’ birthday. It was very foggy out here by the airport when I took Lulubelle in to the beauty parlor this morning for her holiday coiffure. I took her down at 9 and to my surprise she was finished by ten. That was unusual. I spent much of the day finishing up typing up my handwritten journal from February 1989. Sure brings up memories from thirty years ago. I mailed off a letter to Kyle about the emails I have from Indiana State. I got a message from Vine yesterday that notifies me whenever there is a change in Kyles’s status. “This e-mail is to inform you that the parole hearing for Warren Foote has been held and a decision has been reached. For more information, please contact the Utah Board of Pardons and Parole. The telephone number is (801) 261-6464. This notification is sponsored by your local law enforcement and the State of Utah. It is our hope that this information has been helpful to you. Thank you,  The VINE Service.’  Kind of frustrating that it didn’t say more but no sense calling as I will see Kyle this weekend and if he was approved he wouldn’t be moved until next Tuesday and if he was turned down being transferred to Fortitude then I guess I will find out when I see him. His wrangler jeans came by UPS today. He wanted me to come this Sunday but Alan Anderson invited me to the Royal Court’s Snow Ball because his Kyle didn’t want to go so he could play Dungeon and Dragons with his buddies. I am both Alan and Jim Dabakis’ proxy spouse I guess. Anyway I will go Saturday during Kyle’s visiting time of 7:35 in the morning. Fog turned to a misty rain for the rest of the day and after typing I curled up with the novel Knife in the Fog which is about a fictional account of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle tracking Jack the Ripper. The style is good if not plodding and I know the outcome that the identity of Jack the Ripper is still unknown. I ate up my bean soup and another bowl of stew and I cooked up the rest of the roast in the crock pot. Trump’s personal lawyer Cohen pled guilty to lying to Congress about Trumps commercial dealing in Moscow. Today was the last day of Filmstruck but the Criterion Collection of films may be starting a new service.

 

30 November 2018 Friday

So the dark month is over and last night about 2 in the morning the pups got me all up again especially Harleigh, Buddy, and TJ. I tried to ignore them but the barking and whining made that impossible. Harleigh and Buddy go hysterical... barking and running up and down the hall...then TJ joins in... I try to ignore it but it goes on for a half an hour until Harleigh goes outside and starts barking there... I can’t let him wake the neighborhood so I haul his butt up and finally, to get some peace and quiet, I give in and break out some can of Kirkland dog that only Buddy eats... I used the time to clean the kitchen and start the dish washer and at three I went back to sleep. After the treats, every one settles down... I have a mutt mutiny... try putting six dogs on diets...it's impossible... I was tired for most of the day thanks to the pooches but I typed up half of  the month of March 1989 when I went to lay down about two thirty when I heard my doorbell rang. I was pleasantly surprised to find Jim Dabakis on my door steps after his having a meeting with the mayor...he came baring gifts of a basket full of primary documents regarding the transitioning of the Gay and Lesbian Community Center of Utah [now the Pride Center] from the Utah Stonewall Center in 1998 from 20 years ago. So there went my nap. It was a rainy drizzling kind of day. Tomorrow is World AIDS Day. It used be a big deal and activities were planned to remember how the scourge was decimating our communities. I wonder if there will be any recognition of it tomorrow. In 1988 I made Utah's first AIDS panel to promote the Utah AIDS Memorial Quilt Project. I had forgotten what had happened to it until typing up my journal from 1989 I had written I had given it to Ben Barr who was at the time the director of the Utah AIDS Foundation which from there it made it into the nation quilt. The panel was one of many displayed at the Salt Palace when a fourth of the Quilt was on display. I made the quilt for Michael Spence who I had never met but John Bennett had wanted a panel made for him. Michael was known as Tracey Ross and was a drag queen performer and a member of the Royal Court of the Golden Spike Empire. I hand stitched the entire panel as that I didn't have a sewing machine however Bruce Barton did hem it for me.

·         Doug Murri In years past I've attended candlelight vigils on World Aids Day in SLC, Las Vegas and even in St. George, UT. However, this year, I've been searching the internet for functions and I'm not finding any listings for any of those cities. There is an open house at an AIDS organization here in Las Vegas tomorrow, but that's all. Sad to see our communities forget all we've been through.

·         Teinamarrie Scuderi I remember being on the World AIDS Day planning committee in the 90s. There was always a candlelight vigil.

·         Deb Hall I worked on the committee when the quilt came thru SLC all those years ago and it was the most moving project I've ever been involved in. Thank you for all of your amazing work in our community Ben.

·         Vega Starr Tracy was Princess Royale 6, and our first African American titleholder. <3 she made history in our organization.

·         Benedgar Williams I never met her nor knew she was African American. It's hard to tell but the background was a dark purple velvet that I imagined a drag queen would like...ha! Later I learned how special she was to a lot of people in the court. Back then I knew very little of the court members and I might add or them of me 😉

 

DECEMBER

1 December 2018 Saturday

I was up at five thirty this morning to start stirring because I didn’t want to oversleep because Kyle’s visiting hours were early. Although I arrived there in plenty of time the jackass correctional officer kept us waiting so we missed 15 minutes of our visiting time.

When I finally did get in to see Kyle I was really surprised when he said the parole board denied his early release to the Fortitude halfway house. He knew it since last Wednesday, so he had some time to process the disappointment  but I was just stoic knowing that we have no control over his situation and a year from now they will have no hold over him what so ever.

The parole board did tell him to check back in six months in June. We had such high expectations for him and I was hoping for him to come home for a day or so but that and going to school will be put on hold. I feel like I am as much punished as Kyle so I guess I have at least six months more of driving down to Draper and at the most a year. What a blow. Craig Crawford’s parents were out visiting him. I guess he will be turning fifty tomorrow.

I hugged Kyle and Craig when I left to go straight up to Memorial Grove. Maggie Snyder sent me a message this morning before I left for Draper inviting me to an AIDS brunch that the Utah AIDS Foundation was hosting for World AIDS Day at the Memorial House within the park. She asked me to sit at their table as that a couple of people they had invited were sick and unable to attend.

When I was visiting Maggie, I told her that I had seen Craig Crawford. Kyle had told me that Maggie had written to him a couple of times. I told her how strange and weird it felt for me to see Craig knowing how Jim Dabakis feels about him after he had killed John Williams. She said something to me that I felt profound that when she was treating people she always had to separate the humanity of the person from what they had done. She said that Craig was still a human being and is remorseful for what he had done when he was so hopped up on meth. That little insight helped me deal with the conflict I felt about being friendly to a murderer.

I sat next to Kristen throughout the benefit where a brunch was served and we visited above the din. I ate just a small quiche, some pineapple, and coffee. Ries was asked to say a few words as well as others. Felt it always an honor whenever I am able to visit with her. We shared some of our Quaker values and I learned that Maggie is a Texan like me...ha!

I saw only one or two people wearing red ribbons when in the olden days there was not a lapel that didn't sport one. Lots and lots of young men there in their 30s and 20's who never knew a world in which AIDS did not exist. The benefit was necessary but seemed less of a memorial for those who have passed than a fundraiser for the services that the Utah AIDS Foundation provides.

In the news President George HW Bush died last night at the age of 94. Before we all start lamenting Bush Sr.'s passing y'all might remember that he was a CIA director, oil magnet, invaded Central America, started Desert Storm, and his sons stole the election of 2000 which started perpetual war in the middle East.

This is Worlds AIDS Day so you might want to remember the ACT UP protests before you’re mourning him...

It was cool but clear enough that I decided to leaf blow the back deck and I drove up to Centerville to buy some more Bromide tablets for the hot tub however I was so to that the supply place that I bought hot tub filters and sanitizer was gone and turned into something else. That was a wasted trip so at home I went on line and ordered Brominating Tablets from Amazon. So much for shopping local.

It was so nice this morning, clear, beautiful skies, and now it's cold and damp ... what happened? Must be December. Warm bread pudding sounded good on this cold December with a dab of cool whip... I am calling it dinner... eggs, bread, milk, and butter...it's like breakfast lol

 

2 December 2018 Sunday

I woke up to the first real snow fall with about an inch and a half already on the deck. So glad I took the leaf blower yesterday and cleared off the veranda and deck. The first real snow fall.

Ken Berry the actor from F Troop from the 1960s died at the age of 85. I loved him in his F Troop Uniform as a teen in the 60s lol.

 Happy Chanukah to my Jewish friends and...in school I would decorate for Chanukah, Kwanzaa, Yule, as well as Christmas and sing secular holiday songs... my way of being culturally subversive in monolithic Mormonism.

Alan Anderson invited me to go with him to the Royal Court's annual Snow Ball which is a fundraiser for their AIDS Christmas fund... I don't know how many years it's been since I went to their gala dinner and a show at five and met Alan there...it was a Snow Ball for sure as the city is covered and it was snowing when I arrived at the Rose Wagner theater where the Night In Oz theme was performed.

It was good to see so many familiar faces and the courts royalty was all decked out in their crowns and tiaras. I visited with Robert Moolman and discovered he had been a high school teacher for 14 years...no wonder I like him a lot... and i admire how much he tries to support all aspects of our community. The supper, the little I ate was good, ham and turkey and trimmings buffet style.

I drank a lot of coffee to warm my bones...I noticed losing so much weight my feet and hands get so much colder now like an old person...

Peter Christie from Ballet West came by to see Alan, and I asked him if Washington Elementary was still involved in the I Can Do program and I was happy to hear that they were and very supportive even after all the old guard 5^th Grade Teachers left.

 I saw a lot of folks like Walt Larabee and Stephen Bolinder and Chuck Whyte who I think is mad at me from last Thanksgiving. Oh Well. I stayed to hear Marita Gayle aka Marty Pollack perform because that was kind of historic as she never performs in drag anymore but was a founding member of the court some 43 years ago and is the Queen Mother of the court...then I left and was home by seven to go home to curl up with my pups.

I did drive down main street where all the trees were lit up with blue lights...Salt Lake City knows how to do Christmas... so between attending a Utah AIDS Foundation fundraiser and the court’s benefit for people with AIDS it's been a busy weekend...

Yesterday while visiting with Kristen Ries, she told me a little about how those who started the Utah AIDS Project in 1985 came to her for support and she gave them a sizeable donation of $500 as seed money...I never knew that because she is so humble.

I am concerned about Maxx whose left eye seems to be swollen shut poor boy. It snowed for most of the day the first real snow fall that stuck to the ground. I am glad I went to see Kyle yesterday when it was pretty out and clear.

 

3 December 2018 Monday

Walking through a winter's wonderland... Woke up with lake effect over night to six inches of fluffy snow sugar coating everything. It was beautiful but cold. Fortunately, the ground has been warm enough that the streets and sidewalks have melted  here in the West Pointe Jordan River District of northwest Salt Lake City. It’s time for some hot chocolate.

Another expensive day at the vet. I came home last night from Snowball and saw that Maxx's left eye was swollen shut. I looked at it and the whites were beet red. He didn't act like it was really hurting him but since I had an appointment at nine for Harleigh to be groomed, I took Maxx in to the vet hoping they could see him. They had me drop him off to do an eye stain and later called and said he has an ulcerated eye. He will need medicine and eye drops and wear a cone of shame... this just came on last night with no warning or indication so I was really surprised. I am glad I went in and hopefully caught it in time...Maxx is such a good boy.

Between Buster and Maxx the expenses add up but if you are going to have pets it's the price you pay for their unconditional love. It was $150 for the vet and $65 with the tip for Harleigh’s grooming but he looks so pretty.

I was dragging for much of the day still writing up my report for Wednesday’s lecture but it’s really coming hard for me because 1989 was so personal to me. I am reading a new Poirot book The Big Four after finishing a Knife in the Fog.

Utah’s Theocracy over turned Proposition 2 the Marijuana Initiative  and replaced it with their more controlled bill. Republicans are assholes and hate the will of the people.

 

4 December 1989 Tuesday

Ever noticed when an anti-Gay initiative is passed in Utah by the majority, the Republicans claim it’s the will of the people but let the people pass an initiative that the Mormon Church doesn't like, it is overturned and replaced with a "compromise". Theocracy is anti-democracy anyway you look at it and Republicans can do whatever they like because they know 67 percent of Utahns [Mormons] will vote for their Priesthood leaders.

·         Richard P. Butler wrote- I was just going to comment and post about that very same thing. Pass Prop. 2...check Utah Reps want to change it after it passes....double check.… Utah controlled by The Church......Absolutely! Separation of church and state is impossible when the church is the state.

·         Erick Myers: Yes, that's the bigger problem, isn't it: Mormons in the legislature support the church viewpoint, regardless of what their constituents want. Ben, I agree that theocracy is anti-democracy and it makes life unfair for LGBTQ people in Utah. However, I am encouraged that not all Utah Mormons voted according to the will of church leaders. Many of them are starting to see things from a different point of view. Still, the influence of the church is too powerful and is a negative influence on life in Utah, in my opinion.

·         Michael Aaron West: Republimormans = ASSHOLES!!!

·         Dennis J. Lee Within the Mormon church you have the prophet, the quorum of the 12 and the legislative branch...

·         Randy Olson If money is involved the church will have a revelation to its advantage. I feel as if I'm looking at the money changers before the temple steps.

·         Richard P. Butler Randy Olson they bought Crossroads, tore it down and built a billion-dollar shopping complex. Buffer zone for Temple Square (now rectangle) not for profit my ass.

·         Doug Murri Realistically, the owners of pot farms and distribution companies need to give the LDS Church a cut. Give them a "piece of the action", like businesses have had to do with The Mob. If "The Church" can make some money from it, that revelation will come.

 

5 December 2018 Wednesday

Leading up to my presentation that I give at the first of the month, my house goes to wrack and ruin... but my talk is done. I did some laundry, stripped my bed, and changed my bedding. I made sixteen copies of the 1989 chronology for tonight at Fed Ex down on 21^st and Redwood Road. Each copy cost me about a dollar a piece for the six pages.

Then I went to the Gay Men’s Sack lunch because it’s been a while and it sounded like I was missed. I talked to Dale Sheld asking whether Connell O’Donovan had talked to him yet about speaking at the January Queer Historical Society Meeting and he hadn’t. Dale acted surprised that he was being asked as that he had only met Connell twice yet Connell acted like they were good friends.

I think the reason Connell wanted Dale to speak is that he’s been in a relationship for fifty years with his husband. Dale is a retired speech pathologist who worked for Davis School District like I did.

I brought some cupcakes to the lunch and it was good to see Charles Bigo as he’s been confined because of his broken foot.

At home I  gingerbread cookies for tonight’s Historical Society meeting. For some reason, this presentation has been really taxing on me I think because so much of it had to come from my memoirs.

I went back down to the Pride Center for my presentation at seven. We had a decent turn out but missed some of the regulars so it was a smaller group tonight, maybe about fifteen people but everyone seemed to have enjoyed it. I was glad when it was all over.

Today was a national day  of mourning for George HW Bush, Federal offices and the Post Office was closed. I didn’t watch or listen to anyone it although several of my friends said they felt moved by the eulogies given and I guess Trump was a mess while sitting with the other dignified Presidents and First Ladies.

 

6 December 2018 Thursday

I spent the entire morning deep cleaning my front room...I got tired of the grime that six dogs can drag in and because I had been so busy on the computer the past week I just let things go...

Once I started cleaning I got a bug to rearrange my furniture which was a major pain to do by myself. The living room is so tight that it was hard to move the red couch to the south wall and the recliners to the railing but this old guy did. I couldn't believe all the dirt and chew bones and empty dog food cups beneath the couches. So I swept, mopped, and vacuumed up the floors.

The dogs all hid in the bedroom not sure what was up with all the commotion. I did loads of laundry too and put throw blanks on all the furniture that the pups like to nestle in. So should be good until the next snow storm when 24 little wet feet come running in and out of the house.

Typing up my journal from thirty years ago makes me so grateful for where I am right now in my life. I didn’t have a car back then and either walked, rode a bike, or took the bus. In the winter it was so miserable standing in the cold waiting for a bus. Now I have an attached garage where I can just get into my car without having to scrap snow. I am truly blessed and when it’s time for me to go I won’t have to leave much behind except the affection of people and critters who love me.

 

7 December 2018 Friday

I heard this today-“My real age is unknown... I am as old as the stars.” In a study, published in Nature Medicine, German researchers found THC to have a “very robust and profound effect” in reversing brain aging and restoring learning and memory in mice in four weeks. I always said in my old age I want to wear big floppy hat and smoke pot...so far I am only wearing floppy hats.

Today is the day we remember Pearl Harbor and the Day of Infamy.

I started off the day cooking Chili Verde and made a crock pot of red chili too. I told Michael Romero if he would come over and put the free movies that Filmstruck gave for having been a subscriber on my Roku, I’d make him some Chili Verde. I haven’t made it in a very long time, perhaps even a year since I can’t eat tortillas anymore and don’t have company I rarely bother.

My knit cap I ordered and some spa water shock I ordered on line came today. I love my beanie, its black with yarn colors of pink, blue, green, and yellow intertwined in it. I guess I will have to order hot tub supplies on line since the store in Centerville closed. I spent most of the day typing up December 1989 from my journal.

 

8 December 2018 Saturday

Foggy and kind of an inversion day. Secret Santa left a 20 lb. bag of dog food on my porch. It was already opened so who ever brought must have had a finicky dog and knew I had a boat load to feed... it's senior food so hope no one's senior passed away... Harleigh is eating it some of it ... the rest not so much.

I went down to Draper to see Kyle Foote this morning. His visiting hours were from 9:30 to 11:00. I saw Jenny in the visiting room and finally got to thank her for buying me the egg McMuffin last November. I told her how Kyle was denied parole to the halfway house so I’d be seeing her some more for at least for the next six months.

 She is a neat woman and one good thing from all this visiting the prison we got to meet each other. We talked how we love the inmates we visit but that they deserved to have been sent to prison for betraying the trust of those who loved them.

Kyle and I had a nice visit but didn’t have a whole lot to share. He said that if they don’t take him out of the work program he’s in now he will quit it because some inmate is going to be coming into his program who is trouble, doing drugs and such and Kyle doesn’t want to have anything jeopardize his chances of going to Fortitude by being associated with him. He also is afraid that he could be seen as a snitch since he doesn’t do drugs and he could be harmed in the process.

After our visit I called TJ Otaka and Jim McMillan but no one answered so I didn’t go out to Daybreak to see them.

Did a little grocery shopping for some more dog food and treats and typed up some more of my 1989 journal to put on line.

I had planned on making it an early night when I get a text from Jim Dabakis at three thirty a last-minute invite to see the Christmas play, “Miss Bennett and Christmas at Pemberly” at the Pioneer Theater tonight... I was not sure what it's about but agreed to go. .Jim forgot he had tickets for it and his husband is in Madagascar.

We visited some before the play and he said that this coming Tuesday he will make a decision to run for Mayor of Salt Lake or not. I believe him that he really doesn’t know what he will do.

Earlier when he told me he was undecided rather to run for mayor and he sounded hesitant I suggested that he retire from politics and enjoy the good life in Mexico but I’ve changed my mind and said that maybe he should run because it’s in his blood.

We reminisced how we had similar experiences of being outsiders, attending BYU, and making Salt Lake City our adopted home. If Jim Dabakis does choose to run for mayor there would be three Candidates from the Gay Community. I joked hope that doesn’t split our vote and some damn Republican slips into office.

I overheard him tell Carol Spackman Moss’ husband that it probably cost a million dollars to run an effective campaign and he queried rather would the money be better spent if he just donated it?

Anyway we stayed through the entire play which was light and airy but excellently performed however if it was a movie it would have been a chick flick. I took Jim home and I was home by a little after ten.

 

11 December 2018 Tuesday

President Trump had a temper tantrum meeting with Democratic Leaders over the budget saying he’d shut the government down if he doesn’t get funding for his boarder wall.

 

15 December 2018 Saturday

I went down to see Kyle Foote at Lone Peak this afternoon and there were a lot of visitors so I was kind of worried rather I would be able to get in since the room is so small and perhaps can only hold about 30 peoples. There was nothing to new to visit about.

            At the house had a holiday get together and made corn chowder and chicken noodle soup and bought some crusty bread the other day at Caputo’s. I made some rum balls, Christmas cookies, and a pecan pie. It was nothing fancy just for my friends  dropping by people coming at different times during the early evening. Bill Poore left first because he gets anxious around people and besides didn’t have his hearing aids with him. Michael Romero came and brought Coco with him and others were Richard Harmston, Charles Bigo, T. J. Otaka and Jim McMullin. It was a nice small get together before it gets crazier.

Some Texas judge ruled that part of Obama Care was invalid. Republicans have been trying their damnest to void it all together.

 

21 December 2018 Friday

Today is the beginning of Yule and the shortest day of the year. In the news Defense Secretary Jim Mattis announced his resignation, upset that Trump is removing troops in Syria as the cause. The government also went into a partial shutdown after President Trump’s budget for the border wall was rejected right before Christmas.

 

23 December 2018 Sunday

Kyle Foote’s visiting day was Sunday this time so I was able to see him before Christmas. No matter what a year from now he should be able to spend Christmas home with me.

 24 December 2018 Tuesday

No Entry

25 December 2018 Wednesday

Bill Poore came over for Christmas bearing gifts of scented candles, a ham, and some blankets. I fixed a dinner for Michael Romero and him of a turkey. It didn’t seem much like Christmas to me.

            After Bill and Michael left, I took down the Christmas tree and decluttered. I was tired of looking at it and am ready to move on.

 

27 December 2018 Thursday

Kyle Daniels brought Alan Anderson and his pups, Bhanni and Corky over for me to doggy sit while they go to California for some bowl game that the University of Utah’s Football  team is playing in.

 

29 December 2018 Saturday

I went down to the Point of the Mountain to visit with Kyle Foote before the year is out. It was really crowded again. We had to wait nearly a half an hour before they processed us to go back. Every table was packed so you could overhear each other’s conversations. Kyle said they had him driving a snow plow so he’s been out a lot.

 

31 December 2018 Monday

I spent the night by myself and went to bed early glad to be ending this year.